The Book of Tomorrow

I was wathching a bluebottle yesterday. In an effort to escape the living room, he kept flying against the window, hitting his head against the glass over and over. Then he stopped launching himself at it like a missile and stuck to one little windowpan, buzzing about like he was having a panic attack. It was frustrating to watch, especially because if he'd just flown up a little bit higher towards the top of the window he'd have been free. But he just kept doing the same thing over and over again. I could imagine his frustration of being able to see the trees, flowers, the sky, yet not being able to get them. I tried to help him a few times, to guide him towards the open window, but he flew away from me around the room. He'd eventually come back to the same window and i could almost hear him: 'Well, this the way i came in.....'

 I wonder if my watching him from the armchair is what it's like to be God. He sits back and sees the big picture, just i could see that if the bluebottlejust moved up the window to the top, then he'd be free. He wasn't trapped at all, he was just looking in the wrong place.I wonder if God can see a way out for me. If i can see the open window for the fly, God can see the tomorrow for me. That idea bring me comfort. Well,it did, until i left the room and returned a few hours later to see a dead bluebottle on the windowsill. It may not have been him but still....Then, showing you where my mind is right now, i started crying...Then i got mad at God because in my head the death of the bluebottle meant i never find out my way out of this mess. What good is it being so far back you can see everything and yet not do anything to help?

Then i realized that i was the god on this occasion. I had tried to help the bluebottle, but it wouldn't let me. And then i felt sorry for God because i understood his frustration.

Sometimes when people offer a helping hand, it gets pushed away.


Taken from The Book of Tomorrow.